Butterfly Vibrators Explained: Types and How to Use One

A butterfly vibrator is a clit vibrator shaped like a butterfly, with "wings" that spread the vibration across your vulva instead of one small point. Most are wearable or hands-free. To use one, charge it, add a little water-based lube, place the center over your clit with the wings resting on your outer lips, then choose a gentle pattern and move your hips until it feels right.

Butterfly vibrators have been around for decades, but newer designs add stronger motors, app control and shapes made for grinding and riding. Here is what a butterfly vibrator is, the different types, how to use one and what to check before you buy.

What is a butterfly vibrator?

The name comes from the shape. The central body sits over your clit, and the two wider sides, the wings, rest on the area around it. That shape does two things: it keeps the toy in place against your body, and it spreads the vibration over a wider area, so the feeling is fuller and less sharp than with a bullet vibrator.

Butterfly vibrators are made for external play. Some models add a small internal part, but the classic butterfly is all about the clit and the vulva.

Types of butterfly vibrators

Strap-on butterflies

The traditional style comes with elastic straps that go around your hips and thighs, so you can wear the toy hands-free. They are simple, but the straps can feel fiddly and the fit varies from body to body.

Panty butterflies

Smaller butterflies made to sit inside underwear, often with a remote. They are discreet, and because they are small, the vibration is often gentler.

Ride-on butterflies

Modern designs you sit on, grind against or hold between your legs, with no straps at all. Our Butterfly Remote Control Scissoring Vibrator belongs here. It is a wearable ride-on toy built for hands-free stimulation, with a rocking motion design for a gentle back-and-forth movement.

Our butterfly vibrator at a glance

• Dual motors that deliver whisper-quiet, intense vibration
• 9+9 control patterns you can switch from your phone or the included remote
• Rocking motion design for hands-free pleasure
• Premium silicone, hygienic and odorless
• Waterproof and shower friendly
• USB magnetic charging, cable included
• In the box: the vibrator, the remote control, the magnetic USB cable and the instruction manual

It is also the toy people on social media started calling "the scissoring vibrator", because of the way you grind against it.

How to use a butterfly vibrator

1. Charge it and wash it

Charge the toy fully with the magnetic USB cable, then wash it with warm water and mild soap and let it dry.

2. Choose your controls

The remote is the quickest way to start. If you prefer your phone, pair the toy with the app following the instruction manual.

3. Add water-based lube

A small amount on the surface of the butterfly helps it glide when you move. Use a water-based lube with silicone toys.

4. Find the right spot

Place the center of the butterfly over your clit, with the wider parts resting on your outer lips. Small shifts up or down change the feeling a lot, so take a moment to find your spot.

5. Pick a position

• Sitting on it: place the toy on the bed and lower yourself onto it.
• Lying face down: rest your body on the toy and let your weight create the pressure.
• Lying on your back: hold it between your legs and press your thighs together.

6. Start soft, then build

Begin with a gentle pattern and slow hip movements. When you want more, switch patterns or press a little harder. You set the pace with your body.

7. Clean it

Wash it with warm water and mild soap after use, dry it completely and store it charged.

Butterfly vibrator vs other clit toys

• Butterfly vs bullet: a bullet gives a small, pointed buzz. A butterfly spreads the vibration across a wider area and stays in place without your hands.
• Butterfly vs suction toy: suction toys like the rose use airflow on the clit itself. A butterfly uses vibration over a wider area. If you like focused suction, read our guide on how to use a rose toy.
• Butterfly vs wand: a wand gives strong, rumbly vibration that you hold in your hand. Our Magic Premium Wand has two motors, so both the head and the tail vibrate, with 10 modes.
• Butterfly vs app vibrator for G-spot and clit: if you want internal and external stimulation together, look at the Flamingo APP Control Smart Vibrator.

You can compare all of them in our sex toys for women collection.

Tips for your first time with a butterfly vibrator

• Warm up first. A few minutes with your hands makes the vibration feel better from the start.
• Try both sides of the pressure scale. Light contact feels teasing, firm contact feels deeper. Switch between the two.
• Use a pillow. Placing the toy on a pillow lifts your hips and gives you a softer base to grind on.
• Let your thighs help. On your back, pressing your thighs together around the toy adds pressure without using your hands.
• Explore the patterns slowly. With 9+9 patterns, it is easy to skip past the one you would love. Stay on each for a little while.
• Take it into the shower. The Butterfly is waterproof and shower friendly.

If you would like something even smaller and easy to hide in a drawer, our Lemon Clitoral Toy is a compact clit toy that uses rotating airflow with 10 suction modes, and it is quiet enough to use anywhere.

How to clean and store a butterfly vibrator

Clean your butterfly after every use. Rinse it with warm water and a little mild soap, paying attention to any seams or grooves where lube can collect. Pat it dry with a clean towel and let it air dry completely before you put it away. Store it in a clean pouch or in its box, charged and ready for next time. Keep the remote and the magnetic cable together with the toy, so you always find them.

What to check before you buy a butterfly vibrator

• Power. Because the vibration spreads over a wider area, weak motors feel faint. Look for strong or dual motors.
• Controls. A remote is easy, app control gives more options. Both is best.
• Fit. Strap models depend on your size. Ride-on models can adapt to more bodies, because you control the position yourself.
• Material. Body-safe silicone is smooth, easy to clean and odorless.
• Noise. If you share your home, quiet motors matter.
• Waterproofing. Waterproof toys are easier to clean and work in the shower.

Still learning what you like? Our guide how to use a vibrator if you don't know where to start covers the basics.

For a full walkthrough of riding and grinding with the Butterfly, read what a scissoring vibrator is and how to use it.

Butterfly vibrator FAQ

What is a butterfly vibrator used for?

For external clit and vulva stimulation. Its wide, wing-like shape spreads the vibration and makes hands-free use easy.

Do you wear a butterfly vibrator inside?

Classic butterfly vibrators are external. Our Butterfly is a ride-on toy you press and grind against, not an insertable toy.

How do you control the Butterfly vibrator?

With the remote control included in the box or from your phone, with 9+9 control patterns.

Is it quiet?

Its dual motors are designed to deliver whisper-quiet, intense vibration.

Is the butterfly vibrator waterproof?

Yes. Its premium silicone body is waterproof and shower friendly.

How is it shipped?

In plain, unbranded packaging with discreet billing. Shipping is free.